Saturday, September 24, 2005

the problems we choose

today i found myself in the middle of an unseen war.

it started early in the day with the laundry. there was a tall pile of it in one corner of my room that it wasn't unnoticeable. i was forcibly taken out of my loving bed and into the washroom where the violent turning of the washing machine whirrsss its terrible sound. i felt the pain suffered by the clothes as they seemingly, helplessly tumble and drown. it's their necessary pain. not mine. i only reap the benefits - clean underwear, for one. but the sheer number of things to wash is overwhelming. and sleep is biting its pangs into my system. it's seven o'clock, how can i help it? my day, apparently, was made even before it started.

i chose to ignore it.

sometimes, a second or two kept to oneself saves a lot of trouble for the world. that mere second changes one's outlook in life. a deep breath might even save your life. i did what i had to do, nothing more. instead of being grouchy and ill-tempered, and make a total jerk of my day, i stayed calm, took a deep breath, and patiently carried out the task of washing two-week old dirty laundry. i won that invisible battle for my right being. i probably saved my sanity with that choice. and the work was done, i got to go back to sleep.

until of course some other job required my attention... and the skirmishes begin again.

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